Drop And Give Me Twenty

I used to be in tip top shape - 110 pounds, blood pressure was 120/80. This wasn't just when I was a teen either, it was AFTER I'd had both of my kids and not so long ago. My doctor and I looked back at my chart the other day to see when I developed hypertension and he reminded me that in 1994 I was qualified as a fitness instructor and probably could've won a fitness "pageant" if I had any inclination to prance and flip and tumble in 80's wear...I didn't, so I didn't.

So what the hell is this leading to? Let me tell you: FF and it's all going to shit. And, in looking back at what happened, I've concluded that my life starting going down the tubes and stress became my middle name at the same time I started giving up on stuff. I'd always worked out....HARD - everything from step aerobics to weight training. In between I'd water ski and play tennis. I was always active and a french fry never passed by my lips, making me "that skinny bitch" that females loved to hate. But, that was then and this is now and I need to regroup. I'm still pretty hot by most standards but, I'm not so happy with my lifestyle. I'm worrying about where things could head if I keep putting everything else before me.

I don't know when I decided to give up on myself but, somewhere along the line, I started to. I quit everything I loved doing for a time (not conscientiously, more that I was being pulled in several different directions and was needed by everyone, all the time). I started on my own diet plan, namely the "Fatkins" diet, which included everything from pizza to cola to whatever I could grab in a hurry. That was a shock to my system...I'd been a health nut my entire life. I wouldn't eat a lot of my new found "pleasures" (poison) - but enough to be concerned that it's a dangerous direction to head in. And I'd often starve all day because I was "busy", then grab anything I could wolf down without having to actually swallow, as I was starving by the time I got around to eating. A bad plan. Usually I wouldn't eat until night, and then I'd make up for lost time. I'd never done that before and I was having a hell of a good time going off the food guide deep end. I think I hit my bottom the morning I was caught eating "breakfast" by my son - it consisted of potato chips and tzatziki dip...."what the hell you doin', Mom?". I just shrugged, as chip crumbs fell off my face and into my lap. I didn't see it as a problem. But now here I am, in my forties and realizing that I want to get back into fighting form. And I'm taking action now, before it becomes a problem (damn it!).

I remember, at the height of my obsession, climbing on my stepper at 2 a.m., Pearl Jam cranked on the ol' walkman. I must've been slightly crazy but I also had endless energy and MADE time for myself. I don't even know what that means anymore.

If there's a lesson in all of this, keep up with some form of activity or you'll be sorry. You hear about "middle age spread" and, let me tell ya', it creeps up on you and then pounces when you least expect it. I'm not going to let that happen. It's very real if you don't do a little preventative work. It's o.k. to "slide" a little here and there but be careful - before you know it you need a personal assitant to help tie your shoes. Personally, I'm not so much concerned about my "appearance", I'm pretty damn good for my age. It's my overall health I worry about. And, although I still look good for my age, I no longer feel like I could wrestle a buffalo like I once did. So time to jump back on the ol' wagon here.I'm starting tomorrow (sound familiar?). No more of this affair with food and procrastination..... I'm going to make "me" a priority and take one hour each day to put something back that's missing in my life. I won't be "Sweatin' To The OIdies", I'll be sweatin' AS an oldie. Wish me luck - hope I live to talk to y'all again. If not, please send help. I'm going to reaccquaint myself with an old friend named exercise....I just hope that she remembers me (will keep you posted).