Sunday, August 29, 2010

A new & improved/happier Deb


Anybody (still) out there?

First of all - sad that people connect, then disconnect here in the blogworld. Most have moved on to those cesspools otherwise known as Facebook & Twitter (whom we will now refer to as Twitfaces), but some have just plain disappeared. And that saddens me (WN - you know who you are).

I am doing well. Extremely well - saw my doctor Thursday for the first time in nearly two years and he went "wow, you're looking great". So I guess that's good.

I am a summer person - have always known that. Am happiest when it's summer and I can spend half my day outside. Am back to a pretty rigid fitness routine - was missing from my life for awhile and it's a big piece that needs to be in place if I am to be truly happy. Have been running since I was 12. Started swimming/aerobics in my teens. It's just part of who I am and I feel complete with a dumbbell in my hand.

Work is great. Insanely busy and chaotic - but that's how I roll. The people are fantastic and as crazy as I am, so it works well for me.

Have been moderating on the Canucks forums, which is where I spend 98% of my non work/family related time. Great people there, too. So it seems that I'm surrounded by them, which is a big part of my overall happiness these days.

The downside in my life - road rage. I could shoot people when I drive - no questions asked. Would likely be easier on all of us. Today I fingered 3 people in one trip. Outta control. They are.

But I'm working on them. We'll get them straightened out soon.

That's it - a whole lotta nothing. But a smile on my face, and that's fairly new.

:)

Tuesday, June 08, 2010


I had to fire someone yesterday...that did not feel good.

I read her FB status later in the evening, which stated that it "was the worst fucking day of her life".

So then I really did not feel good.

I felt that we should've given her a chance...explained why she was not meeting expectations and seen if an improvement was made. We had a meeting last week to discuss "her" and that was my recommendation. Then she didn't show up for work yesterday. Brilliant. Done deal as far as my boss was concerned. I did it via telephone - pretty uncool in my opinion. The Employment Standards Act likely thinks so too.

Ah well, life goes on.

Today her FB status read" "best day of my life - sun is shining and Tom Petty tonight".

I guess she's over it. So I can be too.

Thursday, June 03, 2010

Few & Far Between


New and improved Deb is here.

I am loving my new job (although, after 8 months, I guess it's no longer classified as "new"). The time flies by and I really look forward to going to work. It is stressful, don't get me wrong - my coworker equates it to the stock market trading floor. But I thrive on that - on organized chaos...it's where I live.

After having been in a rather suffocating, one sided marriage that really didn't focus on me much, I'm finally coming into my own (again). I have a purpose beyond being a Mom (which will always be my number one priority)...I love that I feel challenged each and every day.

I was promoted to office manager today and got my third raise. In a nutshell, it feels damn good to be appreciated, respected and feel worthy of all of that.

Not everything is rosey - Dad was sued and owes a very large award to ICBC. Initially, it crushed us - nearly took us both down as we were devastated by the news that we thought couldn't possibly ever come true. How could it? The guy was a fraud and I'd taken enough pictures and gathered plenty of evidence to support that. But he had one thing we didn't - high priced lawyer friends. 'Nuff said.

In the end, we both concluded that we shouldn't let this consume us...that, if we did, he really had "won". It's money...we can survive (and will). Move on.

The ex is a dick. But we already knew that. It just needed to be reiterated because, apparently, this week is be a total dick week.

All in all, Deb is happy. And she hopes you are too. :)

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Saturday, February 27, 2010

Oh hai there

I really don't want to let go of this place, despite the fact that I only seem to come here for quarterly visits.

This is where "the internet" really started for me - where I "met" the dearest people. So I just won't let this place die. Flounder around, blue and lifeless - yes. Die - no.

I'm working, full time, as a Customer Service Mgr for a moving company. I thought I hated my job, but it seems that that was attributed to one nasty coworker (who, apparently, I helped get canned). We had 3 fights within the first month of my employment...I'm blaming her for all of them. She was an extremely negative bitchy bitch and everyone agrees that she was toxic to the environment. So now I love my job, as it's a rather happy place. Much freedom in a family based deal. Plus, I just heard we get tickets to a box at GM Place for Canucks games so, I guess I'm a lifer now.

I suppose the biggest news here is that the Olympics are in town. The place is electric - people are having the time of their lives and the gorgeous, spring like weather last week didn't hurt either.

In Richmond (where I live) we have the speed skating "oval", although I've never stepped inside it (yet). It's a lovely big piece of skating rink, although somewhat intrusive in its location, which was once a quiet little spot where I used to walk by the river. There was also a trailer park there, which I find rather ironic. But now it's just a bustling hub of activity. And a big, freakin' traffic jam.

I did venture down to the "O Zone", which is fairly close to my place and a stroll up the road from my Mum in law's (knew I hung onto the ol' gal for a reason). I felt I needed to participate in something, although I'm quite happy to just watch the whole ordeal from the comfort of my living room.

I saw the Canadian Tenors there - they were fantastic and it was a great experience. To see people from all over the world, coming together in a united show of bliss, is really quite something. People of all ages, singing "Oh Canada" and braving the cold of night to be a part of it all. Connecting in a way I've never seen before...it was like we were all floating through a dream - the lights, the sounds, the smiles. It was beautiful and euphoric. Then I stepped in puke outside the Holland Heineken House and it snapped me back to reality. "Oh yeah"

Although I'm really quite opposed to the whole idea of the massive costs associated with Olympic games, I love them despite that - always have (I just think Deb's bargain basement could do them cheaper). As a sports fanatic, I can't get enough of them and almost miss the fact that I don't have to stay up all night, watching in different time zones. I mostly watch the events from work, on my laptop, then come home and watch the replays.

But I must admit that this is a big deal. The feeling here, everywhere you go, is fantastic. It's like Christmas day, every day. The streets are filled with people wearing flags and clown suits and everyone's friendly, smiling and, well, drunk. To see the streets filled with people giving way to one another instead of elbowing to be first in line....waving out the window without using their middle fingers, is quite lovely. And there's cowbell...what more can I say?

My daughter is totally immersed in the whole deal - although it's funny how, as a family, we're all experiencing the games in totally different ways. (Uh, speak of the devil, there she is now...)
She's totally caught up in the music end of things - I think she's taken in a free concert every night since the games began. She does it a little differently than I do but, hey, she makes it up onto the big screen and gets the crowd cheering. She's also lined up for 5+ hours to do the zip trek over Robson street. Twice. (She's an animal). Me? - I'm quite content to open my living room window and hear things from afar.

My son took in the hockey game last night at Robson Square (which is the place to be for us poor folk). He said it was awesome - despite the pouring rain, thousands of people still poured in there. Oh wait, I see what I did there...it wasn't intentional. For the most part, we're really behaving nicely as a city/country. I've been holding my breath, waiting for another riot ('cause that's how we roll here), but it seems that we've learned how to party the right way.

Although I do feel sad that I'm not really "involved" in a hands on way, I don't feel left out. The spirit of the Olympics is everywhere and although I never thought I'd say this, I'm going to miss them when they're gone next week. I like it when the world parties in my backyard and I feel proud of how things have gone.

Our athletes have been stellar - true class acts with so many stories of courage and inspiration. I won't go into details (that's what Google's for), but amazing.

For those who really know me, you know that MY Olympics are this weekend, when the hockey gold is decided. Although I watch all the events, cheer like a crazy woman in my red and whites and hold my breath for each and every finish, the hockey kicks it up a notch for me. It's intense. I'm a little over the top (like this guy).

So I'm sitting here, drinking pounds of coffee, waiting. For tomorrow. That's when Lu and the boys will do me proud, like every other athlete this week who's given it their all to entertain us lame brain couch potatoes.

In a nutshell, I really do wish I had had more money time to get involved at the street level of things. Although I was initially somewhat resistant to being "invaded" by the Olympics (hey, I like my space), I can say they've been an absolute blast as far as I've seen and from all accounts around me. And, although I can sit back and look at pictures that others have taken along the way, it's gone by too quickly and I wish I'd seen/done more. It crept up so slowly it seems...and then BAM, it's over. Back to quiet, comfortable monotony I guess.

UPDATE: Apparently I am now joining my daughter and her friends to participate in some of the hoopla tonight, as we're heading to Wintersleep (her second time seeing them this week) and Wide Mouth Mason. While I don't know Wintersleep, she tells me it's like an hour long jam session. And Wide Mouth Mason, well, they're family (my cousin married in..they played at her wedding). So it's my duty - I must go. And even moreso because my daughter has extended an invitation for me to join them. What kind of mother would I be if I didn't?

Back soon.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

I'm sitting here, beer by my side, because I can.

I wish I could just take the easy route out and become a full blown alcohol - but I don't like drinking much. So scrap that - a nice idea, but it wouldn't work. I''m too responsible to crack. So I crack a beer instead. At 3:05 when everything around me is falling apart, because I feel like it completes the sentence. I. AM. FAIL.

I don't really believe that, but I just threw Linds out of the house for the night and am sitting with Ty, head heavy in hands, as he battles a bout of anxiety. Such is life.

I've struggled to make things "right", to make my kids' lives be ok. Times like this I say a big "you've failed Deb". (Did I just say that?)

Problem is - I don't buy that....I know I haven't. I've devoted myself - my every moment - to making sure my kids are ok. I've remained on my own for that purpose (no man was good enough to enter my kids' lives). But, somehow, we've hit a wall tonight.

It'll be ok....somehow, we'll battle through this adversity and laugh, united, once again. But tonight I just feel like I want to be numb and even Poker After Dark can't capture my attention long enough to make me forget that I have to be up soon for work.

Man, I've been running on empty (but strong) for so long. I feel invincible these days...but times like this confuse me. I don't want to be thrust into dysfunction because I'm too busy functioning. My bring it attitude gets me through but, suddenly, I want to quit tonight.

I won't.

Thursday, November 19, 2009


Someone mentioned Deb's Box today, so here I am.

Had all but forgotten about this place. Not the dear friends I've met, just the mindless dribble that fills the space.

So the new job is meh. Love it one day, am ready to quit the next. I am the Customer Services Manager and, for the first time in my life, will soon have my own business cards to drop into the restaurant "win a dinner on us" fishbowl. So, basically, my job entails cleaning up the shit that everyone else has created (kind of like my job at home as "Mom"). I have mixed feelings about my coworkers - they are sleazy, conniving, lying, salesmen who have the overall integrity of a jar. On the other hand, they are family oriented, generous (how does that work?), light hearted, understanding individuals when they drop the sales pitch. Seeing things from this end of things scares me...usually I'm the customer demanding service on the other end of the phone. My downfall in this job might be my empathy and the fact that I don't like to screw people over which, apparently, is mandatory.

I love the actual work - the composing emails and schmoozing the customers (I have 8 new friends already) are right up my alley. But it's all the unnecessary screw ups that I have to witness that have me pulling out my hair....it appears to be a difficult concept for some to grasp that if you do the legwork and ensure things are done right from the get go, you save yourself a lot of heartache (and work) in the end. I am not cut out to be a salesperson if it means selling garbage. If the infommercial's going to be believable, I have to believe in the product. I don't know that I do.

For now, I have a paycheck coming in. But Deb has never been and never will be a good liar. That is what I have learned this month.

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Just a quick update, as I really don't want to just completely throw in the towel here.

Dad's had a bit of go lately - a couple of stints in emerg., etc. Initially, was frightened that the huge mass he had in his abdomen might've been more of the dreaded C...thankfully, it doesn't appear to be the case. Nevertheless, his much anticipated hip replacement surgery scheduled for the end of September was put on hold indefinitely as he requires more "emergency" type surgery to clear up the bowling ball on his gut.

The kids are great. I'm still unemployed, meaning we're nearly homeless. Went for an interview last week - really felt I connected with the women who interrogated me but apparently they don't want old gals whose greatest skill is baking banana bread either. Have to update - am not proficient in Word, Excel, Power Point or Cantonese, but man, I whip up some mean fajitas! Hope you're all well...miss you dearly. Will try and make the rounds later but, according to today's schedule*, no promises...

*Today's schedule:

-This
-Drive Fiona to Surrey
-Walk the dog (we've kidnapped the ex's lab again)
-Cut Dad's grass
-Pick up Linds and deposit her at her point B
-Rush home to start dinner
-Pick Linds up from B and deliver her to C
-Laundromat (maybe, although I'll likely saw screw it and wear mismatched socks again)
-Something else that I know I'm forgetting