Saturday, March 03, 2007

This absolutely bites. I'm not kidding, I can't take much more of this. I have zero fucking energy. I'm impatient...my doc says that he wants to see my hemoglobin up 10 points by next week - that that would be ideal. Fuck that, I want it up 50 today. I cannot live like this - I was not meant to live like this. I am a doer, not a slug. Aaaargh, I'm going to start shooting nails outta' my eyes soon if this body of mine doesn't fucking hurry up and get back to normal. I was at 63 - 150 is normal. MY normal is 125. So, as he put it to me, I'm operating at half energy. Tell me about it. I feel like I'm 103 and I'm watching fucking curling today to prove it. Bring me my afghan and my crochet needles now.

Fuck this, I've had enough. I want to go water skiing.

Bitch officially over (soon). I'm going to see Mom - I haven't seen her hardly at all. So fuck it I'm outta' here.

(At least I have my Candlebox today...good angry music. It's loud. And I'm gonna' dance, for fuck's sake. If it kills me at least I die with a smile on my face and the f word on my tongue.)

7 Comments:

Blogger tkkerouac said...

drink your ferrous sulfate and get cooking with liver and onions.

6:59 PM  
Blogger Toccata said...

Curling! Oh, dear that is bad. It's ironic how we want a day off to do nothing but suddenly when we are forced to it is the last thing we want to do!! Hang in there Deb so you can get back on that bike of yours.

8:44 PM  
Blogger LaLa said...

Whoa...63? That's pretty low. Right before I was admitted to the hospital they had me at 39. Not that I'm bragging or anything. Ok, maybe a little. =)

Hope you start feeling better soon. And just a little tip? It's a well known secret that the big 'O' helps improve your counts. I know people that swear by it before they give blood!

9:40 PM  
Blogger Deb said...

o.k. trace...but I'll feed it to the ex's dog, k?

tc...I know, CURLING!! All I need is my cardigan and slippers and I'll be all set. I snuck out to see Mom but she was sleeping. I'll try again tomorrow because I hear she's really missing me.

lala - whoa....39 gives you bragging rights girl. O.K., I'm taking your advice on improving my counts then. I'll try anything at this point. And how are you feeling these days....are you o.k.?

10:03 PM  
Blogger LaLa said...

Well, the cold I had took a lot out of me. I pretty much was laid out in bed for that whole week. But now things are back on the up and up. But screw cancer, it's the boredom that's killing me.

12:49 AM  
Blogger Barbara Bruederlin said...

Wasn't the curling exciting yesterday? I really like both the Stoughton rink and the Gushue rink (even without Russ Howard) so it was tough to decide whom to back.

Oh wait, you were kidding about being excited watching curling... Sorry, it's just my speed.

Hope you find something more stimulating today.

7:35 AM  
Blogger Deb said...

Actually Barb, I confess, I'm into it now. Mom used to have me tape it for her all the time and now I just find myself watching it when it's on. I would've bitched about anything yesterday - it was frustration building. Personally, I'm a Ferbey backer, but I like Gushue's team too. The BC/Alta match went right down to the wire, didn't it?

7:41 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home