Welcome To The Jungle Baby, It's Gonna Bring You Down (ha)

Be careful, because that little white lie may come back to bite you in the ass.

It's no secret that I've been screwed over by my strata/property management with regards to my "settlement" and the repair of my condo. Although it's by no means a dead issue with me, I've elected to put things on hold until the spring. It's been one hell of a year and I needed to destress for awhile. But I intend on following up with things when I have the energy.

Last year, when I tried to address my concerns "on record" at the AGM, the property manager quickly dismissed me and insisted on only talking off record and after the meeting. She is a fairly new property manager - the one we had before her (for 15 years) was extremely professional and never a problem. The new one, not so much.

Leslie is a bitch. A Joan Collins, trampy, "I like the boys better than the girls" kind of bitch. I don't do well with those types. And I think she feels somewhat threatened by me (because I'm younger?). So when I did meet with her after the meeting, things quickly escalated and she's lucky I didn't practice my tae bo on her sorry ass. She was smug, rude and didn't hear a word I said. She defended the contractors who'd screwed things up and the (good looking) insurance adjustor who she probably wanted a piece of. They were boys, I am not. Enough said.

A couple of the strata council members were there and were their usual tail between the legs help. Let me tell you about the council here: they're corrupt. It wasn't always this way...my two best friends next door ran things for a long time and did a great job. Things ran smoothly with them on board but, unfortunately, they've both since died, leaving way for the current ass clowns. These two friends of mine (lesbians who took no shit) had no problem keeping the bastards in line and quite enjoyed doing so...they found their antics amusing. I miss them terribly, they were wonderful people and we shared a lot of laughs OVER said ass clowns. They'd always urged me to join them on council, but I'd declined, as I knew that they were quite capable without me. I trusted them.

I actually got on council for two years after they died but the boys there didn't like the feathers being ruffled and resented my presence. They're all long standing members who've lived here since the dinosaurs roamed the earth and they like to keep it a gentlemen's club...outsiders are not welcome. In two words, they suck. They'd always hated Joan and Tam (my friends) - but I think they were a bit scared of them (they weighed in at about 250 each and were tough as nails). So, when they died, I'm quite sure the boys remaining on council did a celebratory high five amongst themselves. There was now no one standing in their way and they could look after their own interests without having to be bogged down with other's concerns. They exploited their status as council members to the hilt.

Let me give you two examples of this: we were painting the place a few years ago. We all hated the color scheme they'd (council) selected and insisted on a vote with some other choices. We voted and the majority of us picked a different color. Council threw it out and we had another vote. Same results, same actions. They went with their choice, despite the overwhelming votes in favor of a different selection. Just blatantly ignored the vote. Not a big deal but, in the overall scope of things, you can't let this stuff happen or it sets a precedent and it's not long before no one else has a say. You can't do this (unless, of course, you're George Bush).

I was re-nominated last year to sit on council but they argued that I no longer could participate because I'd missed several meetings last year and they ousted me. I explained that it was due to Mom's illness/passing (which they knew, because I phoned before each missed meeting - I missed 5 out of 12), to which they responded "well what about your priorities?". Perfect foot in mouth. Priorities...uh, my Mom's last few breaths sort of trumps discussing roof drains with you clowns. Sorry - you lose. Anyhow, again, they ignored the fact that I'd been voted in and it wasn't until I got the notice for the next meeting that I saw that my name wasn't included. They'd just "decided" that I was out.

Anyhow, for the sake of my sanity, I gave up my seat and accepted this (quitter). I was running out of fight as the deal with Mom sucked the wind out of my sails. But I did make sure that I nominated someone to take my place who'd challenge these guys and keep them honest.

Our complex kind of has two faces to it: the north end is mostly full of groggy old stuck ups who keep to themselves and think they're better than everyone else. The type that stare in your window as they walk past* (you'll see why this is relevant later) and, while always poking around and sticking their nose in other's business, they do nothing to take care of it like they're supposed to.

THE GOOD GUYS:













THIS end (the "good"/south end), is full of really great people. We all meet out back in the summers to barbecue and mingle on a regular basis. We look out for each other and a perfect example of this is the fact that I never have to shovel snow...these two guys from the south side always do it for me and I get home from work to find a clear sidewalk/driveway. Cool people they are. We are friends as well as neighbours. And we all feel the same about "the other end". We actually threw a big bbq last year (our suggestion, of course) for the entire complex, in the hopes of bringing us all together. I thought it was successful. The success ended after that day, when groggies decided to go back to staring and glaring vs socializing.

The fellow I convinced to sit on council is one of my two snow shovelling angels. The people from this end are pretty much reluctant to get involved on council (and used to come to me as their voice while I was on there)....mostly because they're just too nice. But also because they know it's pointless...groggies have a monopoly on things and it's pretty much a waste of time to attend meetings. But we've thrown Caesar into the ring now and just hope he doesn't get burned (like I did). He's hanging in pretty good so far. Poor guy.

Anyhow, where am I going with all of this? Well the AGM was held on Wednesday night and I've attended every year. And every year it's the same old bs - council steam rolls their way through the meeting and listens to nothing. This year I'd planned on going and finishing up with my business by presenting a letter and insisting it go on record. That way my concerns couldn't be ignored without having a paper trail.

At the last minute I didn't have it finished or the energy to deal with it at that point. I decided I'd wait and give it to Caesar (my council friend) to forward at the next meeting. Might be more effective if a council member bring it forth rather than me (it could mysteriously get "lost" if I gave it to them).

The council chairman called me to remind me of the meeting beforehand, so I said I was sick and didn't think I'd make it. Food poisoning. Near death kind. Total lie. Why?....I don't know. Because I didn't want to say "I won't be there because I can't stand any of you". so I thought it was just best to lie instead. FTR - I do like the chairman...he was agreed upon when some of us demanded that council get some new blood...although none of the other members would step down, they did agree to a new chairperson to mix things up. This fellow is fairly stupid neutral and does what they tell him. So he was allowed in. I like him, but know he's their puppet.

I forgot about the meeting after our call and went about my business...part of that being my workout later in the day. It was a good one...had a lot of stress to release and no one was home so I cranked up the tunes, opened the living room windows and went at it. I was doing high intensity step aerobics (my favorite)...was really into it...had Guns & Roses "Coma" on (yes, I still like G & R for working out...pass me my headband PA-LEESE). I was sort of half thinking that it was WAY too loud when I noticed the entire council (and bitchzilla), strolling past my window from the meeting. I'd completely forgotten about it and the fact that I was supposed to be deathly ill. I was in a full knee up, jump on the step move, weight in hand, loving life. It was during Slash's guitar solo and I'm pretty sure I was air guitaring too. Yeeha, be scared of me motha fucka's. Ahem, o.k., I'm good now.

Of course, they did their full head turn gawk inside, to see what dirt they could dig up. I felt like waving. Or maybe just one finger saluting? Anyhow...busted. Not sick, just sick of you people. Now move on, show's over.

I erupted in serious laughter after they'd strolled past...what timing. I don't care - I hate these people. I'm glad they know I lie to them because they aren't worthy enough of the truth...that being that THEY make me sick and I can't stand being in the same room as most of them. But too funny, nonetheless.

So that's my lie for the week. You been busted for anything? And did it thoroughly amuse you, as mine did me?